Sharing Diamonds: Spiritual Hints from Sa, Part I
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During the Middle Ages it was I who taught mankind about the "mind worm." If an individual's entire mind was open and clear to your gaze, you create for that individual the one thing this person is least capable of dealing with. But this is also the very thing that will allow this individual to attain the most spiritual growth. I did that. It was no big deal. It is the kind of thing practiced by higher demons but without the intent to help the individual.
This statement from Sa is a diamond, and since it occurs within the larger diamond that is the entire conversation, I call it a "diamond within a diamond." The larger diamond that is the conversation has at least one other diamond within it, and I plan to discuss that other diamond within the diamond in my next post. But for now, let's discuss the diamond within the diamond that is quoted above.
This diamond, from my point of view, reflects quite clearly the fact that magical training isn't just about learning to visualize, or accumulate the elements, or project the vital force. I mean, sure that's part of magical training, but another part of magical training is facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with. Facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with is most likely to be an unpleasant experience filled with a lot of suffering. But this doesn't have to be the case. As I'll explain later, there are things you can do to minimize the amount of suffering you experience when you reach the stage of your training where you have to face the one thing you are least capable of dealing with.
When you face the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, you have to learn from it. After you have learned what it has to teach you, then there is no more need for it, so you can move on, at least in theory. Speaking as someone who has been through this, I know that the one thing I was least capable of dealing with was being a nobody while not having the hope of ever becoming a somebody. In other words, of being an unimportant person who would be forgotten by history and having no way of ever becoming important. Suffice to say, I wanted to be somebody important. I wanted to be a household name. I wanted people centuries from now to know who I was and what I did. Being a nobody wasn't so bad while I still retained hope that someday I would become a somebody. But then one day my life changed in such a way that, despite having a good education and many advantages, I became highly unlikely to ever become somebody important and well-known. I won't go into the details of what happened, aside from saying I fell in with a bad crowd (as a result of unwise choices) and suffered some consequences (as a result of more unwise choices I made while associating with this crowd). For a while, my life was filled with suffering and I thought I'd ruined my career. But in the end, I was able to see that all of this suffering stemmed from my ability to face the fact that I, with my record, was unlikely to climb the social ladder and become someone important and famous. When I realized this and worked on accepting this, I underwent a lot of spiritual growth. After that, I could really start to rebuild a new life for myself and things were different but fine again.
When it comes to facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, my advice is to pray constantly for wisdom and understanding. If you have understanding, then when you find yourself in a situation where you are facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, then you will perceive what is happening. If you have wisdom, then you will know how to deal with the situation in the most skillful manner, and thus minimize the amount of suffering you undergo in the process of facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with. Please do not wait until you are in the midst of facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with before praying constantly for wisdom and understanding. Depending on what stage of spiritual evolution you are going through, it may be a few years before you reach the point where you have to face the one thing you are least capable of dealing with. Use those years to prepare. The worst thing is to find yourself facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with and have no idea what is going on. Then you will fall into despair, and as William explains in his essay on negative spirits, feeling despair is like sending an SOS call into the sitra achra. Prayer, by the way, is an infinitely powerful spiritual technique. You can do anything with it. When you find yourself facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, you may need to employ it in other ways in addition to using it to obtain wisdom and understanding. Therefore, it is really best to become a master of prayer before facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with. Think of it like Aang trying to master the four elements before facing Fire Lord Ozai or Harry Potter trying to learn to cast a Patronus before facing a Dementor again. Imagine if Aang had just lounged around. He'd have been crushed by Fire Lord Ozai. Imagine if Harry Potter had just lounged around. His soul would've been sucked out by the next Dementor he happened to cross paths with. If you don't prepare adequately, then whenever you inevitably find yourself facing the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, you will be crushed and your soul will be sucked out of you. Remember, we are not talking about some random thing that is merely difficult to deal with. We are talking about the one single thing you are least capable of dealing with. Unless you have done a lot of introspection and shadow work, there is a decent chance you do not even know what it is, so don't get the idea that you don't need to prepare.
For those of you who are Catholic or Eastern Orthodox Bardonists, I have one more piece of advice. You should build a good relationship with God, Jesus, and your Guardian Archangel so that they will help you when you face the one thing you are least capable of dealing with, but do not neglect to build a good relationship with Mary as well. Her help was invaluable to me when I was facing the one thing I was least capable of dealing with. She truly is the Star of the Sea who lights the way for people in all situations, including situations that involve facing the one thing they are least capable of dealing with. She is the Mother of Good Counsel who advises people in all situations, including situations that involve facing the one thing they are least capable of dealing with. She is the Queen of Angels who sends angelic powers to assist people in all situations, including situations that involve facing the one thing they are least capable of dealing with. For Catholic Bardonists, the best way to build a good relationship with Mary is by praying the Rosary every day. For Eastern Orthodox Bardonists, the best way to build a good relationship with Mary is by saying the Prayer Rule of the Theotokos every day. If you only understood the power of even one Hail Mary, one Angelic Salutation, then you would see that whatever it is that you are least capable of dealing with, it is no match for the power of the full Rosary or Prayer Rule of the Theotokos. The Rosary is a weapon. It is a weapon purely of peace and in no way a weapon of violence, but it is a weapon nonetheless. It is a weapon against despair. It is a weapon against the challenges we face in life. It is a weapon against ignorance. Just as a Jigen-ryu sensei is a master of the sword and a Shaolin monk is a master of the staff, the Catholic Bardonist must become a master of the Rosary and the Eastern Orthodox Bardonist must become a master of the Prayer Rule of the Theotokos, which is the Eastern Orthodox equivalent of the Rosary. Otherwise, you are like a Jedi without a lightsaber, or King Arthur without Excaliber, or Arya Stark without Needle, etc.
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